I Hate You More
by DancingRaindrops
Summary: -"How unoriginal," complimented Chad, that infuriating smile dancing around his lips once more. "You supposedly write your own lines, and yet you can't even figure out a proper insult without having to copy mine."- Dedicated to Absweet for her birthday!


A/N: Hello, everyone! :D This fic is dedicated to my lovely friend **Absweet**, because today is her eighteenth birthday! *throws confetti* Happy birthday, Sarah. :) I'd also like to send a shoutout to dear Chas, for inspiring me (however unintentionally) with the idea for this fic. :P I hope you all enjoy! :D

**I Hate You More**

"_I hate how much I love you, boy." –Rihanna, feat. Ne-Yo_

"Knock, knock." Chad walked through the open door to Sonny's dressing room, his verbal knocking entirely irrelevant.

"Who's there?" Sonny asked without looking up, scribbling on a piece of paper at her dressing table.

"Sonny," answered Chad cockily, making himself comfortable on Tawni's bright orange couch. Sonny, recognizing his voice, paused writing and closed her eyes briefly, as if to wish him away.

"Sonny who?"

"Sonny is madly in love with Chad Dylan Cooper." Already frustrated by her inability to create an original idea, Sonny rolled her eyes and took a deep breath before spinning around in her chair to face him.

"Chad, get out. I'm trying to write a sketch," she told him as calmly as she could.

"Now, now, Sonny, is that a very nice way to greet a visitor?" Chad placed his hands behind his head and leaned back, making it clear that he meant to stay.

"You mean a trespasser," corrected Sonny, unable to keep a small smile from creeping onto her face.

"I'm not trespassing! I have permission to be here," Chad proclaimed indignantly, as if shocked by the very idea of trespassing.

"No, you don't. I forbid you from this dressing room." A full grin had made its way onto Sonny's face by now as she feigned haughtiness and turned away from Chad.

"Ah. You see, there's a problem with that; I already have permission from someone else." Sonny turned back almost instantly, surprised. "I don't need it from you," continued Chad with a smirk before adding, "though, of course, I would like to have it as well."

"Maybe when pigs fly," Sonny shot back, covering up her curiosity.

"Is that your favorite saying?" Chad deflected her response easily, leading her off track and confusing her slightly.

"What? No, of course not, why would you think that?"

"Because you use it rather frequently," he said nonchalantly, shrugging his shoulders.

"Only because there are _many_ things having to do with you that won't happen until pigs fly," retorted Sonny, privately smirking.

"Perhaps I should teach pigs to fly then." Chad grinned, knowing that his reply would startle Sonny. She attempted to hide this and think up a witty comeback off the top of her head, a talent which required the creativity that she had been lacking only a short ten minutes ago.

"Go for it, Chad; it's rather funny to see you fail." Sonny beamed as she spoke, pleased that her mind had begun to function properly again. Chad shook his head, entirely unconvinced.

"Chad Dylan Cooper never fails."

"Wanna bet?" Sonny lifted an eyebrow, excited by the prospect.

"Of course! I've never failed at _anything_," declared Chad proudly. Sonny produced a triumphant smirk to rival his, smiling brightly.

"Well, then it's too bad that you have officially failed at receiving my permission to be here. Now get _out_." She gestured pointedly at the open doorway, the supposed fury behind her demand lessening somewhat due to the grin on her face that she was trying to conceal.

"Sonny, I already told you, I have permission," repeated Chad, smiling wryly as if to ask why she couldn't remember such details.

"From whom, may I ask? I know Tawni wouldn't give it to you," Sonny rationalized, racking her brain for who else could possibly have the authority to hand out permission slips for entering their dressing room. "Who was it, then? Marshall?"

"It was a qualified professional. A doctor, actually." Chad sighed as he mentioned the profession, removing his hands from his head and placing them in his lap. Sonny noticed the abrupt mood change, but chose not to remark on it in favor of satisfying her questions.

"...and why would a doctor give you permission to be in my dressing room?" Chad looked down at his hands and twisted them together, looking more dejected than Sonny had ever seen him.

"Because the doctor knows that I am currently extremely ill," he answered softly, "and he ordered me to say my goodbyes to everyone I know." Sonny's jaw dropped as she stood up from her chair, shocked.

"Your goodbyes? _What_?" She immediately rushed to Chad's side, seating herself so she could face him on the couch, reaching to take one of his hands.

"Yes. It has become clear that I'm afflicted with a very severe case of LBS," Chad replied solemnly, his eyes fixed on the way Sonny's fingers played anxiously with his.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! What is that, Chad?" Chad looked up into Sonny's chocolate eyes, now wide with fear, and drew in a slow, dramatic breath of air as if it pained him.

"It's called Lack of - Lack of - I can't even say it, it's so awful." He shook his head shamefully, keeping his eyes averted from hers.

"Is it Lack of Blood Syndrome? Do you not have enough red and white blood cells?" inquired Sonny rapidly, far more worried than Chad had (_hoped_) expected. He decided to draw out the suspense a bit longer, in the hopes of seeing Sonny even more distraught.

"No, no, it's not that. It's Lack of - Lack of - " Chad paused, gulping for air.

"Lack of Bones? Are your bones too weak? Are they disintegrating or something?" Sonny grasped Chad's hands tighter, and he inwardly chuckled at how well this was going. Of course, being the great actor that he was, he betrayed nothing to Sonny. Instead, he persisted in his dramatic scene.

"No. No, I only wish! It's Lack of - Lack of - Lack of - " Frustrated with waiting, Sonny let go of Chad's hands and placed her own on her hips.

"I bet it's Lack of Brains, since it seems you can't even remember what it's called." Chad frowned, whether at her words or the sudden emptiness of his hands, he couldn't say. "Stop the drama and just say it already!"

"It's Lack of - " Chad saw the fury on Sonny's face and hastily completed the sentence, "Lack of _Books_ Syndrome!" The expression of complete shock on her face was priceless, to Chad at least.

"...WHAT?" She jumped up from the couch, apparently no longer willing to occupy the same space as him.

"I know, it's terrible, isn't it?" Chad blathered on, entirely oblivious to Sonny's anger. "I don't understand why - ow! What was that for?" he exclaimed as Sonny smacked him as hard as she could on the arm.

"Lack. Of. Books," she repeated, her eyebrows raised and arms crossed.

"Yes, that's what I said, I - ow! Stop hitting me!" Chad held up his hands in order to defend himself, surprised by Sonny's violence.

"You actually had me _worried_," Sonny exclaimed, still in disbelief. Chad's features softened as he began to smile ever so slightly.

"You were worried about me, Sonny? That's..."

"Ridiculous, I know," she cut him off, rolling her eyes at her own compassion. "Don't mention it. I can't believe you had me worried over nothing."

"It wasn't _nothing_," Chad pointed out indignantly, getting to his feet as well. "I still have LBS!"

"Just read a book. You'll get over it," shot back Sonny, her pride a bit wounded and slightly embarrassed by her earlier behavior.

"Impossible!" Sonny sighed and uncrossed her arms, letting them rest at her sides as per usual.

"That wasn't funny, Chad," she told him, a hint of anger still coloring her tone.

"Really? I thought it was, and I'm not usually the comedy type," answered Chad with a grin, earning him a heated glare from Sonny.

"I hate you."

"Ouch. That hurts, Sonny." Chad's grin faded as he realized that Sonny was truly offended. "Sonny..."

"That was mean, Chad," she said quietly, looking down at her feet. Chad stepped closer to her, a hand outstretched automatically to comfort her somehow.

"Look, Sonny, I didn't mean - "

"I thought you were going to _die_," interrupted Sonny, shaking her head at her own stupidity. "And instead, you just can't pick up a book." Chad blinked rapidly, rather startled by this turn of events.

"Sonny, I - "

"Get out, Chad. I hate you." Sonny frowned and turned away from Chad, pouting in what seemed to him like a rather childish way of dealing with the situation.

"Thanks. I hate you too, sunshine," he said sarcastically, tapping his foot impatiently as he waited for Sonny to respond. She turned around a few seconds later, unable to maintain the silent treatment she was attempting.

"Well, I hate you more," argued Sonny, annoyance flashing in her eyes.

"Oh, really, Sonny? _Really_?" Chad jerked his chin as he spoke, challenging Sonny and firing her up.

"Really!" she responded with more energy than she had shown throughout the entire conversation, tossing her hair to the side fiercely.

"Well, I hate you more than licorice," Chad stated simply, wincing slightly at the thought of it.

"You hate licorice?" Sonny stopped in her war path momentarily, surprised.

"Of course! It's disgusting. I can't stand it." Chad shook his head and grimaced, imagining the taste (or lack thereof) on his tongue. "Do you actually _like_ that stuff?"

"No, I hate it too," Sonny agreed vehemently, shuddering. "It's just - I've never met someone else who hates licorice too. Everyone I know seems to love it."

"Well, not me. That stuff is nasty. People only like it because it's classified under 'candy.' Everyone leaps at the chance to have candy, even if it's gross." Chad sighed, mourning the obvious failure of mere mortals to recognize the particulars of true candy.

"That's not true! Some people have self-restraint, you know," defended Sonny, the corners of her mouth tucked into a neat frown.

"Is that so?" Chad asked skeptically, cocking an eyebrow and watching her with interested eyes.

"Yes!"

"Okay then," he shrugged without a care in the world, "I guess you have self-control." Sonny grinned self-satisfactorily at her personal triumph.

"Thank you." Chad nodded his head briefly with a smile in acknowledgement before speaking up once more.

"Mhm. Hey, Sonny, want some candy?" His hand moved to his pocket, and Sonny's eyes automatically traced the path, as if she had been told that the world's most valuable jewel lay hidden there.

"You have candy? Really? Can I have some?" Sonny broke out excitedly, forgetting all about their prior conversation and already holding out a hand subconsciously to retrieve the candy. Chad smirked and withdrew his hand from his pocket, empty, leaving Sonny confused until she realized what he had done.

"My point is proven." His eyes sparkled like the stars as he laughed a few times, probably because it was at her expense. She gaped at him wordlessly for a moment before attempting to find her bearings.

"...okay, I - that was - "

"You see what I mean," cut off Chad, gesturing to her current state of speechlessness. "Hence the licorice-loving." Sonny opened and closed her mouth a few times, grasping for words before she decided it was pointless.

"...whatever. I hate you more than licorice too," she echoed his words from earlier, hoping the subject of her gullibility would be left alone.

"How unoriginal," complimented Chad, that infuriating smile dancing around his lips once more. "You supposedly write your own lines, and yet you can't even figure out a proper insult without having to copy mine."

"I so can!" Sonny exclaimed, her brain working rapidly to churn out insults as easily as Chad. "I hate you more than Gilroy Smith!"

"That jerk? A _talk show host_? You're kidding me." Chad, who harbored rather negative feelings for Gilroy, made a face of disgust as he recalled the host's prying ways and irritating eyebrows.

"Nope," Sonny said happily, popping her lips on the "P."

"Well, I hate you more than Justin Bieber!" declared Chad, bringing the battle up to the next level. A small sound of disbelief issued from Sonny's throat as she gasped in protest.

"You did _not_ just insult Justin Bieber." Placing her hands on her hips and widening her stance, Sonny prepared to defend the teen sensation.

"Oh, wait a second, let me think - I just _did_," Chad repeated slowly with emphasis, fully aware of what he was doing and how much it was affecting Sonny.

"How can you hate Justin Bieber?" asked Sonny, her arms still crossed and looking somewhat intimidating for a member of Chuckle City.

"The real question is, how can you _not_ hate Justin Bieber?" retorted Chad, crossing his own arms in reaction and proving his equally stubborn stand on the likability of the pop star.

"You know, Chad, you don't even know what talent looks like!" Sonny grinned to herself as she insulted him, finding it surprisingly empowering.

"Oh, yes, I do," Chad responded almost instantaneously. "It's that good-looking guy I always see in the mirror." Almost as if it was a reflex reaction, he looked past Sonny to check his reflection in her dressing table's mirror, carefully running a hand over it before nodding, pleased. "It's_ not_ that short kid with wannabe hair who hasn't hit puberty yet!" he concluded, returning his gaze back to Sonny when he had finished.

"I hate you more than I hate...bad hair days!" Sonny tried to recover, but her responses simply couldn't stand up to Chad and his quick mind.

"Oh, see, now that doesn't work, Sonny. Know why? Because I don't know what those are like. Never had one, in all my seventeen years." He leaned to the right to look in the mirror again, grinning at his reflection.

"I hate you, Chad," reiterated Sonny with a sigh. "More than I hate _Mackenzie Falls_."

"Finally, an original comment!" Chad applauded, an expression of feigned amazement on his face. "Took you long enough." Sonny lifted her eyebrows and opened her mouth involuntarily, both surprised and offended.

"You are the most selfish, infuriating, unbelievably conceited person I've ever met! I can't believe I - "

"You know you love me," Chad interrupted, a smile twitching on the corner of his mouth. Sonny blinked a few times, attempting to regain her bearings.

"...what? No, I don't!" she denied, incredulity written on her face.

"Keep telling yourself that, Sonny." Chad grinned, knowing she was close to breaking point.

"I will! Because it's the _truth_," asserted Sonny defiantly, folding her arms into their crossed position more securely. Chad shook his head at her and looked into her eyes, taking a step closer.

"Is it, Sonny? Is it really?"

"Yes, it is. I. Hate. You," Sonny repeated, finding her downcast mood from earlier improving for some reason as she argued with him. Chad let his shoulders drop and stared at the floor in dismay.

"I know, Sonny. I know," he told the floor with resignation, sighing. Sonny echoed his sigh, letting out all her frustration with that sigh and uncrossing her arms.

"I don't really mean that, Chad," she assured him, placing a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to look back up at her. He maintained his melancholy countenance for a few moments before grinning as widely as Sonny had ever seen him.

"I know that too. I know everything." Sonny smacked him one more time as she realized he had been acting, but she couldn't help herself from letting out a peal of laughter, reassured by his joking manner.

"Like what?" she inquired with a smile, her good humor restored and a grin to match his planted firmly on her face.

"I know that you're secretly in love with me," Chad declared matter-of-factly, smirking arrogantly as Sonny snorted at the very idea.

"Oh, yes. My deepest, darkest secret," she added, covering her heart with her hands and pretending to swoon dramatically, as if she were on _Mackenzie Falls_.

"Well, good. Because it's mine too." Chad's eyes gleamed as he drew closer to her, all joking aside.

"You're secretly in love with yourself, Chad? That's not much of a secret," offered Sonny in an attempt to bring back the lighthearted mood, her delivery becoming weaker as she gazed into his eyes.

"Well, perhaps some of my other secrets are more well-kept." Chad reached out and took Sonny's hand in an uncharacteristically bold move, leaning his face down to hers so that their noses were almost touching.

"Such as?" she breathed, her words barely a whisper. A small smile creased Chad's lips, curving them upwards as he watched her squirm. Acutely aware of the way their faces were positioned, he touched his nose to hers lightly and gave her a charming grin.

"Guess."

A/N: LOL! A bit of an open ending. :P Imagine what happens next as you wish. ;) It's rather unlikely I'll make this a two-shot, so feel free to fantasize about the ending as much as you'd like. :D I seriously blanked on the title of this, so I'm aware that it's awful. XD Please review! Without you guys and your awesome reviews, I would have left FF ages ago. xP So…I'd love some feedback from you guys. ;) Thank you! *hugs*


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